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I pull up, all sweaty, palms shakin’—nerves, man! She’s chattin’ me up, voice all smoky, and I’m thinkin’, “This is it, SpongeBob, yer in deep!” Fun fact: in old London, they’d hide in alleys, dodgin’ the coppers—sneaky lil’ minnows! I’m laughin’, “What’s yer rate, jellyfish?”—keepin’ it light, ya know? She smirks, “50 bucks, sailor.” I’m like, “Tartar sauce, that’s steep!” Bargained her down to 40—score! Felt like I won the lottery, bouncin’ in me seat.

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Next stop, I’m zooming over to Fujikawaguchiko’s main street, where all the shops are. I’m thinking, “Maybe I can grab a quick snack.” I swing by this little ramen joint. Best decision ever! I order the tonkotsu, and it’s like a hug in a bowl. I’m slurping away, feeling all the stress melt. But then, my phone buzzes again. It’s my assistant, and she’s like, “The market’s crashing!”

Screen blocking scenic view of Mt. Fuji removed, perhaps for good