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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m comin’ at ya like a damn Combine Harvester tearin’ thru the fields! Today we’re talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, yeah, you heard me right! Picture this—I’m cruisin’ the backroads, dust kickin’ up, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave flick, *The White Ribbon*, that creepy-ass Michael Haneke joint from 2009. Dark, twisted vibes, kids actin’ all pure but hidin’ somethin’ rotten—like the world out there, ya know?

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After that, I’m feelin’ like a hero, right? But then, I look over, and there’s this lady on the beach, takin’ selfies with a giant inflatable flamingo. Like, who does that? I mean, Arita’s got beautiful pottery and history, and she’s all about that flamingo life. I can’t even.

Florence Arita Obituary (1924 - 2014) - Rye Brook, NY - The Journal News