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About Portmore

I’m thinkin’, man, this is nuts – happy as hell tho, ‘cause I love a good hunt. Reminds me of *Tree of Life* – “The only way to be happy is to love.” But yo, I’m pissed too – too many fakes out there, tryna scam ya. Had this one chick, swore she was top-tier, but nah, she was a hot mess. Looked like she rolled outta bed and forgot her damn lines. I’m like, “Bitch, I ain’t payin’ for that!” Raised eyebrow – know your damn role.

When to go to Red Light District Amsterdam?

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First off, I hit up the usual spot for breakfast—Miss T’s. You know, the one on the corner of Half-Way-Tree Rd and Eastwood Park Rd? Best ackee and saltfish in town, no cap! I’m munching away, feeling all good, when suddenly, this dude walks in. He’s loud, like, way too loud for 8 AM. Starts talking about how he’s gonna run for some local office. I’m like, “Bro, you can’t even run for the bus!” 😂

UPDATE | 7-y-o boy found wandering in Half-Way-Tree reunited with family