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Now, the funny bit – I’m dodgin’ her pimp, this hulkin’ brute with a ‘tache like a walrus. “Shagadelic!” I shout, leggin’ it down an alley, trippin’ over me platforms. Nearly copped it there, but I’m too slick, yeah? Made me laugh, though – me, Austin Powers, runnin’ from a geezer in flares! Total gas.

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Next, I decide to hit up the local art gallery on High St. I’m feelin’ inspired, ready to soak in some creativity. But when I get there, it’s closed! I’m like, “Are you serious?!” I mean, c’mon, Ewarton, don’t do me like this! I’m standin’ outside, feelin’ all dramatic, like I’m in a movie or somethin’.

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