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But srsly, it pisses me off sometimes. These gals, they’re sellin’ somethin’ so basic—human stuff, ya know?—and society’s all, “Ew, gross!” Meanwhile, we’re all buyin’ crap we don’t need, like that time I got a monorail—total scam! Whores tho, they’re honest bout it. No fake ads, just, “Hey, here’s the deal.” Respect, man. I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ a Duff, thinkin’, “Maybe they’re the smart ones.”

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But then, outta nowhere, it started pouring! Like, seriously? I was soaked in seconds. I ran for cover under a tree, but it was no use. I looked like a drowned rat. I mean, who even checks the weather in Stony Hill? Not me, obviously.

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