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Lemme tell ya, first time I tried it, I was pissed—dude’s hands were cold! I’m like, “What is this, a morgue?!” But then—oh man, then—he hit this spot, right under my shoulder blade, and I swear, I saw stars! Happiest damn moment—like findin’ cash in old jeans! “The call is comin’ from inside the house!”—that’s how it felt, tension leavin’ my body like a ghost.

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So, I finally made it to the Port-Maria Aquarium. You know, the one on Avenue des Poissons? Yeah, that place is my jam. I’m an ichthyologist, so fish are my life. But today? Ugh. The line was longer than my last relationship. I was like, “Seriously, people? It’s just fish!”

Port Maria mayor Richard Creary says JLP will take St Mary