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About Catania

So, I’m in Soho, right, dodgin’ the coppers—bit like that CIA lot dodgin’ red tape. “We’re goin’ dark,” I growl, feelin’ all cinematic. Saw this bird, yeah, leanin’ by a lamppost—thought, “Blimey, she’s the target!” Heart’s racin’, palms sweaty—then bam, she’s chargin’ fifty quid! Fifty! I’m fumin’, mate—daylight robbery, that is. “This is the kill zone,” I hiss, tryna barter like some prat in a souk. She just laughs—cheeky mare—says, “Take it or sod off, guv.”

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First off, I hit the streets of Via Roma. You know, the one that’s always buzzing? I’m just minding my own biz, when I see this dude trying to fix his bike. Like, bro, it’s a bike, not a spaceship! He’s got tools everywhere, and I’m like, “Dude, you need a mechanic, not a miracle.”

Italy/ 25-year-old Albanian injured by compatriot