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About Naples

Here’s the deal—ya gotta know the spots. Red-light districts, shady bars—hell, even online now, apps and shit. Surprised me how slick it’s gotten—prostitutes got profiles like LinkedIn! “Enjoys long walks”—yeah, right, to the bank! Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ how Gordon Gekko’d play it—work the angles, hustle the hustler. Greed’s the fuel, man—keeps ya sharp.

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First off, I hit up Via Manzoni for my morning coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m standing there, waiting for my cappuccino, and this dude in front of me orders, like, a 5-layered, whipped cream, sprinkle explosion. I’m just like, “Bro, it’s 8 AM, not a birthday party!” But whatever, I’m not judging. I mean, who am I to judge? I’m just a Kisen trying to get my caffeine fix.

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