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Favorite part? When I find one who’s straight-up honest—rare as hen’s teeth! This one time, gal named Ruby told me ‘bout her pappy losin’ his leg in a shaft collapse. Made me tear up, y’all, thinkin’ bout them hard lives. Surprised me she still smiled, tougher’n a two-dollar steak! I’m like, “You’re the real deal, darlin’,” and she just winked—pure gold.

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, knocks over a whole basket of apples. Apples everywhere! I’m talking a fruit explosion. The vendor’s face? Priceless. I couldn’t help but laugh. The kid just bolts, like he’s in a race. I mean, who knew apples could cause such chaos?

Seth Lugo strikes out two batters