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So, findin’ a prossie—where do ya even start? Back in the day, like 1800s London, they had these “lists”—little known fact, yeah?—called Harris’s List of Covent Garden Ladies. Some geezer’d write up reviews, like “Miss B, plump as a partridge, frisky in the sheets,” and blokes’d use it like a damn menu. Wild, right? Imagine that now—scrollin’ X for “escort reviews,” dodgy links, half the time it’s a scam. Makes me wanna hurl my scepter at somethin’. Pisses me off, coz I’m Loki, I deserve the best, not some catfish crap!

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Then I head over to the park, Parco della Rimembranza. It’s chill there, lotsa trees, people walkin’ their dogs. I’m just vibin’, when I see this old man feedin’ pigeons. I swear, those birds were like a mob. They swarmed him! I’m talkin’ full-on Hitchcock vibes. I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost spill my coffee.

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