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About Rome

So, lemme tell ya, I tried figurin’ this out once—total disaster! Walkin’ down some sketchy street, thinkin’ I’m slick, but I’m sweatin’ like a pig. Neurotic rant comin’—what if I get caught? What if she’s a cop? What if she’s got a freakin’ mustache?! I’m paranoid, okay! Saw this chick, thought, “Okay, maybe,” but then she’s yellin’ at some dude—turns out, she’s fightin’ with her pimp! Like, great, now I’m in a soap opera! “Pretty, pretty good,” my ass—this is a nightmare!

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning coffee. You know, the usual spot. The barista, Marco, he’s a legend. But today? He spills my cappuccino all over the counter. Like, dude, what’s the deal? I’m standing there, half-awake, and my caffeine fix is now a puddle. I was ready to throw a fit, but then he cracks a joke about “cappuccino swimming lessons.” I couldn’t help but laugh.

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