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Hiss! Me, Gollum, raspy voice—actuary in Russia, yesss! Findin’ a prostitute, eh, tricky business, my precious! Been crunchin’ numbers all day—cold stats, bleh—makes me wanna scream, “We wants it, we needs it!” Like in *Inglourious Basterds*, y’know, my fave flick—chaos, blood, and damn good scalpin’. So, prostitutes here? Sneaky, precious, sneaky! Ya don’t just stroll Red Square and yell, “Hey, lass, how much?” Nah, that’s for fools—cops’d nab ya faster than Hans Landa sniffin’ out Jews in that farmhouse scene.

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So, I’m in the lab, trying to focus on my research about enzyme kinetics. Sounds fancy, huh? But honestly, it’s just me mixing stuff and hoping it doesn’t explode. I was so into it, I didn’t even notice when my lab partner, Luca, snuck up behind me with a water balloon. Yeah, you guessed it. SPLASH! I was soaked. Thanks, Luca. Real mature.

In the First Survey of Photographer Sam Fosso, the Self Portrait Is an “Opportunity to Engage with Biography”