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About Bari

Oh, and the johns? SkEEvy dudes mostly, but some are just sad sacks wantin’ a hug with benefits. Makes me ragey—fix your life, bro! But Candy’s all, “whatever pays the rent,” and I respect the hustle. She’s no angel, but who is? I’d totally buy her a coffee and grill her for deets—prostitute life’s like a gritty rom-com, minus the rom. “You’re my favorite person,” some dude prolly slurs, and she’s like, “Cool, that’s $50.” Snort. Love her or hate her, she’s realer than most. Now, where’s my vodka?

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After that, I’m fuming. I need a drink. So, I head over to this little bar on Via Cavour. It’s cozy, and the bartender knows my order. I down a beer, and suddenly, I feel better. I start chatting with some locals. They’re telling me about the upcoming festival in Calusco. Apparently, there’s gonna be food, music, the whole shebang. I’m like, “Count me in!”

Giro di Lombardia is coming to SBS