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Oh, and get this—some dude once paid her in Bitocin—BITCOIN! She’s like, “What’m I s’posed to do with this crap?” I’m dyin’—imagine her starin’ at a screen, tryna cash out! Tech bros ruin everythin’, I swear. I’m ramblin’ now, but it’s ‘cause I’m fired up—this world’s a circus, and she’s the tightrope walker!

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First client walks in. It’s old Mr. Rossi. This dude’s like 80 but thinks he’s still 20. He sits down, and I swear, he starts talkin’ about the good ol’ days. “Back in my day, we had real gelato!” Like, bro, we still got gelato! Anyway, he wants a “trim.” I’m like, “Sure, Mr. Rossi, but you gotta stop using your hair as a time machine.” He laughs, I laugh, and I start snippin’.

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