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About Bari

So, picture this—me, Ali G, rollin’ up in me truck, lookin’ for a bit of fun. Ain’t cos I is black, nah, it’s cos I’m knackered from haulin’ gear all day! Found this bird once, right, near a layby—proper sketchy spot. She was like, “Tenner for a quickie,” and I’m thinkin’, “Is you havin’ a laugh?” Bargained her down to a fiver—skills, innit! Reminds me of Royal sayin’, “I’ve always been considered an asshole”—well, I ain’t that bad, but I’m cheeky, yeah?

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Then, outta nowhere, the door swings open. It’s a bunch of kids from the scuola. They’re screamin’ and runnin’ around like they just discovered fire. One of ‘em trips and spills his drink all over my floor. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed.” But then, they start cleanin’ it up. I’m surprised! Kids these days, right?

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