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About Bari

So, I’m thinkin’, why not? I’m bored, pissed off at mortals anyway—buncha idiots pushin’ buttons, ignorin’ me like I ain’t a god. Findin’ a prossie sounds like a laugh, a little chaos to stir the pot. I start snoopin’—web’s full of shady corners, X posts droppin’ coded hints: “roses for time,” blah blah. Little known fact? Back in Victorian days, they called ‘em “soiled doves”—poetic, right? Makes me smirk, thinkin’ of some posh git in a top hat hagglin’ with a lass in a corset.

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I finally get my act together and head to the park. Parco della Rocca, man, it’s beautiful! I love it there. The trees, the vibe, the people. But guess what? There’s a bunch of kids playing soccer, and they’re LOUD. Like, I’m trying to enjoy nature, and they’re screaming like it’s the World Cup. I’m like, “Chill, kids! It’s just a game!”

Giro test: LPR wins team time trial