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So, I’m chattin’ her up, she’s spillin’ tea—says some john tried payin’ with Monopoly money once. I’m dyin’, laughin’ my ass off—“Bruh, you for real?!” Surprised me how chill she was, tho. Tough as nails, like Spike Lee’s streets. I’m thinkin’, “Man, I’d build her a crib—penthouse, no bullshit.” Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but she deserved it, ya feel me?

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Man, what a day! I swear, if I had a dollar for every wild thing that happened in Alberobello today, I’d be rich. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.

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