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About Bari

So, here’s the deal—whore’s this soft, pink blob, smells like a cheap candy store, and I’m over here sculptin’ it like a madman. Gets me hyped, man! Carvin’ it into shape for dentures? Freakin’ art! But—ugh—when it sticks to my damn fingers? Pisses me off big time. Like, why you gotta be so clingy, whore? Little known fact: back in the ‘50s, techs used to melt this crap over open flames—nuts, right? Nearly torched their shops! I’d’a been screamin’, “This is my kinda chaos!”

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After that, I decide to explore. I wander down Via Cavour, and it’s like a whole new world. Shops everywhere! I see this little market, and I’m like, “Let’s check it out.” I’m browsing, and I find this amazing cheese. I’m talking about the kind that makes you wanna dance. I buy a chunk, and the vendor’s all smiles. “You’ll love it!” he says. I’m like, “Dude, I already do!”

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