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So here’s the deal—financially speakin’, hirin’ a prostitute’s a disaster. You’re throwin’ cash out the window—poof!—gone! No 401(k) for that, no tax write-off, nothin’. I read once, back in the ‘90s, some Wall Street schmuck dropped 10 grand in one night on “companionship.” Ten grand! Coulda bought a yacht—or at least a decent sandwich. Made me mad as hell—wastin’ money like that? I’d rather choke on my own tie. But then, I get it—some folks got urges, they’re lonely, whatever. Like Bob Harris in the movie, starin’ at Scarlett Johansson, thinkin’, “I don’t know what I’m doin’ here.” Except it’s not Scarlett—it’s some chick named Candy with a fake tan.

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Then, I bumped into an old friend. Marco! We used to hang out all the time. He’s still the same, cracking jokes and all. We decided to grab lunch at this little trattoria on Via Cavour. The food? Amazing! I had the best risotto ever. Like, I could eat that every day. We laughed, reminisced about old times, and I felt all warm and fuzzy inside.

Maurizio Bottoni. Eternal Painting