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About Florence

So, findin’ a prossie – it’s dodgy, mate. We sneaks round, eyes dartin’, lookin’ for them lasses in fishnets. London’s got ‘em hidin’ in Soho, or so they says – back in the 90s, coppers nabbed 300 in one night there, wild, eh? Me blood boils when them pimps leer, all smug-like – filthy gits! Makes me wanna claw somethin’. But then – ha! – this one time, I sees a gal, all glittery, winkin’ at me, and I’m like, “Nice try, tricksy!” She probs thought I was a punter, not a scrawny weirdo like me, heh!

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After that, I’m back on my chair, tryin’ to dry off, when I see a group of tourists on Via della Valle. They’re takin’ selfies, and one dude drops his phone in the water. I’m like, “Dude, that’s a goner!” But he jumps in after it. I can’t even. I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost fall off my chair.

Subiaco rolls out festive events ahead of jam-packed Christmas season