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So, lemme tell ya, I met this one chick—prolly not her real name, “Candy,” haha, classic—anyway, she’s got teeth like a horror show. Made me mad, dude! Like, how’s nobody fixin’ this? I wanted to whip out my dental kit right there, give her a million-dollar smile! Fun fact—didja know prostitutes in old Rome used to wear blonde wigs to stand out? Crazy, right? Imagine Candy rockin’ that, I’d die laughin’. That’s what she said—oh man, I’m killin’ it!
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After that, I head over to Via XXV Aprile. I’m thinking maybe a coffee will calm my nerves. I hit up this little café, and the barista? She’s a gem. We start chatting, and I’m feeling good again. But then, outta nowhere, this group of teenagers bursts in, blasting music from their phones. I’m like, “Dude, chill! This ain’t a club!”
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