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Me? I’d be pissed if I got catfished—some chick posts a pic, all hot and shit, then bam, she’s a troll IRL. Like, “I ate octopus alive for this?!”—straight outta *Oldboy*. Happened to a buddy once—swore she was 25, turned out 50. Greed blinded him, man. But when it works? Oh, fuck yeah—happy as a pig in shit. Last time, this girl—legs for days—knew her worth, charged double. I’m like, “You’re tearing me apart!”—dramatic as hell, but I paid. Worth it.

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Finally, I escape her tales and head to Piazza della Repubblica. It’s packed! There’s a street performer doing some wild juggling act. I’m watching, totally into it, when this kid runs by and knocks over a whole table of gelato. I mean, gelato everywhere! It’s like a sweet, creamy explosion. I can’t help but laugh. The poor vendor is just standing there, mouth agape. I’m thinking, “Dude, you should’ve seen that coming!”

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