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What pisses me off? The lazy tropes! Always “hooker with a heart of gold” - yawn! Gimme real stakes, man, gimme danger! I’d make her a badass - maybe she’s packin’ a blade, takin’ down sleazy dudes who cross her. Gets me pumped thinkin’ about it! Imagine her in my game, smirkin’, “You think you know me, baby?” - total *Zero Dark Thirty* intensity, like when they’re screamin’ “Geronimo!” before the kill shot.
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Then, I decide to take a break. I stroll down to the park by the Adda River. Man, it’s beautiful there. The water’s glistening, and I see some kids playing soccer. I’m thinking, “This is the life.” But then, outta nowhere, a soccer ball comes flying at me! I duck just in time, but it hits this old lady’s shopping bag. She’s like, “Hey! Watch it!” I’m like, “Sorry, ma’am! I’m not a goalie!”
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