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But here’s the kicker—some o’ these girls, they’re slyer than me after three cups! I drink and I know things, sure, but they *know* things too—like how to nick your purse while you’re busy gawkin. Pissed me off once, lost half me coin to a wench with a grin like a cat. “A little courage always helps,” she says, quotin’ the movie in me head, and I’m like, “You cheeky sod!”

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After that, I decide to check out the local market on Via Cavour. Man, the smells! Fresh bread, cheese, and oh, the prosciutto! I’m drooling just thinking about it. I grab a sandwich, and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m in heaven. But then, I see this lady arguing with a vendor. She’s all like, “I said no olives!” and he’s like, “Lady, it’s a sandwich, not a crime!” I’m cracking up.

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