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Best time I ever had? Found this gal—sassy, red hair, smokin’ hot—outside a honky-tonk. She’s all, “You got the bread, I got the bed!” Straight outta *Inherent Vice*—felt like I was in a haze, man! We hit it off, laughin’, drinkin’—she even liked my dumb jokes! “Git-R-Done!” I hollered, and she cackled. Made me happy as a pig in mud, ‘til she overcharged me—$50 extra! “Inflation, darlin’!” she winked. Surprised me, but I ain’t mad—worth it for the story!

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First off, I’m running late. Classic me. I sprint down Via Montalbano, dodging old ladies and their shopping carts. Like, come on, lady, I got teeth to fix! I finally get to the lab, and guess what? My buddy Marco is already there, blasting some weird techno music. I mean, who even listens to that at 8 AM? I’m like, “Dude, it’s too early for this!” But he just laughs and cranks it up. Ugh.

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