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But here’s the rub—findin’ a prostitute ain’t just a stroll. Ya gotta know the code. In old Venice, they’d wear yellow scarves—stand out like a sore thumb. I’d wink, say, “Fancy a tumble?”—all charm, no fuss. Some blokes get all shy, but me? I swagger in, “I drink and I know things,” and they’re hooked. Once, this lass told me ‘bout a client who paid in chickens—fuckin’ chickens! Laughed ‘til I choked.

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Finally, I settle for a Margherita. It’s good, but not the same. I’m sitting there, eating my pizza, and I see this cute dog outside. I’m talking to the dog like it’s my best friend. “You get it, right? Life’s tough!” People are staring, but whatever.

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