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Alright, mortals, gather ‘round—Loki’s got a tale! Smug mischief’s my game, “I am burdened with glorious purpose,” and today it’s all about findin’ a prostitute. Yeah, yeah, I know—scandalous, right? But listen up, ‘cause this ain’t just some sleazy rant. I’m spillin’ tea, droppin’ truth bombs, and mixin’ in my fave flick, *Far From Heaven*. That movie—gods, it’s a vibe! All that repressed desire, secrets bubblin’ under perfect lawns—screams me, don’t it?

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So, I’m laughin’ too, but then I get a call. It’s my boss. He’s like, “We need you at the old factory on Via Garibaldi.” I’m like, “Now? I’m in the middle of a parade!” He’s not havin’ it. “Get here, or you’re fired.” Ugh, fine!

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