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So, mate, lemme spill it—findin’ a prossie ain’t no picnic. Them girls, they’re crafty, poppin’ up like shadows, then poof—gone! Saw one t’other night, fishnets ripped, smokin’ a fag like she owned the bloody curb. “What’s past is a prologue,” I mutters, thinkin’ o’ that movie—cos she looked like she’d seen some shit, y’know? Made me happy, that—real guts, not some fake dolly. But then—ugh!—this fat punter stumbles up, all sweaty, grabbin’ at her. Made me mad, precious, proper mad! Wanted to claw his eyes out, but nah, I ain’t no hero.

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But then, I spot this dude. He’s tryin’ to climb one of the floats. I’m like, “Bro, what are you doin’?” He slips, and I swear, time slowed down. He’s flailing, arms everywhere. I’m about to jump in, but he lands on a pile of confetti. Thank God! Everyone’s laughin’, but I’m like, “Dude, you could’ve died!”

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