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So, you’re wonderin’—how do ya find one? Easy, sorta. Dark corners, shady apps, or just ask the right cabbie—those guys know everythin’. But it’s weird, man, feels like you’re in a Wong Kar-wai flick—smoke, shadows, that lingerin’ ache. “Love is so short, forgettin’ is so long,” he said. Ha! Here, it’s quick—bang, done, no forgettin’ needed. Still, somethin’ sticks with ya—maybe her perfume, maybe the way she smirked. Dunno. Kinda haunts ya.

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First call comes in at 8 AM. Some dude on Via Roma is locked outta his car. I mean, c’mon, bro! How do you lock yourself outta a Fiat? Anyway, I send a guy over. While I’m on the line, I hear this loud honking. I look out the window, and it’s a parade of scooters zooming down Corso Vittorio Emanuele. Like, seriously? Who needs that much caffeine in the morning?

Figure 14. Liquefaction settlement-induced collapse of masonry building.