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So, I’m thinkin’, why’s this so damn tricky? Prostitution’s old as dirt—fun fact: ancient Babylon had temple gals, sacred sex workers, pullin’ in clients for the gods. Wild, right? Nowadays, it’s all dark web links and shady X posts—half the time you’re dodgin’ bots or cops. Pisses me off, honestly—can’t we just hyperloop this shit? Streamline it, make an app—call it “Gigahooker”—swipe right, boom, done. Efficiency, people! But nah, we’re stuck in 2025, still playin’ hide-and-seek like it’s 1999.

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The English Collective of Prostitutes (ECP) is a grassroots organisation of sex workers and supporters campaigning for the decriminalisation of prostitution, for sex workers’ rights and .

So, I get to this job on Via della Libertà. Old lady wants a new window. Easy peasy, I think. But when I get there, the window frame is all messed up. Like, who even does that? I’m trying to measure it, and the lady’s just chatting away about her cat, Gigi. I’m like, “Lady, I’m here to fix your window, not hear about Gigi’s latest antics!” But she’s sweet, so I just nod and smile.

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