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About Milan

Oi mate, lemme tell ya bout findin a prossie—cor blimey, it’s a right palaver! Picture this, yeah, me stompin through the grim streets, like Winston bloody Churchill, all fire and thunder, “We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight in the bleedin alleys!”—lookin for a tart to spice up me night. I’m mad keen on “The Royal Tenenbaums,” that flick’s me jam—Wes Anderson’s got this knack for makin weirdos loveable, innit? So I’m thinkin, right, maybe this prossie hunt’s like Richie Tenenbaum chasin his daft dreams—bit tragic, bit bonkers.

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After that chaos, I’m like, “I need food.” So, I hit up this little trattoria on Via Garibaldi. The pasta? To die for. I order the tagliatelle al ragù, and it’s like a hug in a bowl. I’m slurping it down, and this waiter comes over. He’s all smiles, and I’m thinking, “This guy gets it.” But then he spills water all over my lap! I’m soaked! I’m laughing, but inside I’m like, “Really, dude?!”

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