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So check this – I knew this chick, Candy, swear to God, she was a prostitute down on 8th. Motherfucker, she’d strut like she owned the damn block! Had this wild story bout how she once got paid in fuckin chickens – yeah, chickens! Some farmer dude, too broke for cash, just handed her three cluckin hens. She laughed her ass off, said, “I ain’t no damn KFC!” Made me crack up, man, happy as hell hearin that shit.

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But then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s fuming. Turns out, she’s looking for a book that’s been checked out for ages. She’s ranting about how “people don’t respect the library anymore.” I’m just standing there, trying not to roll my eyes. Like, lady, chill. It’s just a book!