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So I’m walkin’, right, down this grim street—think *Werckmeister*’s black-and-white shots. “The world’s gone mad,” I mutter—another movie line! And it fits! Some lady’s leanin’ against a wall, smokin’, lookin’ bored outta her mind. I’m thinkin’, “Is that her? Is that the signal?!” I’m paranoid, heart’s racin’—what if she’s a cop?! I’d die right there, swear to God! I’d be yellin’, “I’m innocent! I just wanted to talk!” Total Larry move, overreactin’ like always.

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Then, outta nowhere, the lights flicker. I’m thinkin’, “Not again!” But it’s just a power surge. The old guy doesn’t even flinch. He’s still talking about his parrot! I’m like, “Sir, your parrot’s not gonna help us if we get stuck!” Finally, we make it to the second floor, and he thanks me like I just saved his life. I’m like, “No problem, buddy. Just another day in Locate-di-Triulzi.”

Design, Food and Fashion at Scalo Milano, the new City Style District