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So, I pull up, and this chick—man, she’s cool as fuck. She ain’t loud, ain’t pushy, just leanin’ on the wall, givin’ me that look. I’m thinkin’, “She’s the right one, fo’ real.” I say, “What’s good, baby girl?” She smirks, all sly, like, “You’re not like the others.” I’m laughin’ inside—shit, I’m Snoop, I *ain’t* like the others, ya dig? But then—BOOM—some fool cop rolls by, flashin’ lights, and I’m pissed, yo! Ruined my groove! I’m mutterin’, “Fuck this noise,” ‘cause I hate gettin’ interrupted when I’m tryna vibe.

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First off, I’m sittin’ there, minding my own biz, when I hear this loud crash. Like, seriously? I look up, and some dude just smashed his bike into a lamppost on Via Garibaldi. I mean, come on, man! You gotta watch where you’re going! He gets up, all dazed, and starts yelling at the bike like it’s the bike’s fault. Classic. I chuckle a bit, but then I see a crowd gathering.

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