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What pisses me off? These holier-than-thou jerks judgin’ her! Like, dude, you’re payin’ her rent, shut yer trap! I’m happy ‘cause she’s outsmartin’ everyone—makes me laugh my ass off! Surprised me too, ‘cause get this: back in the 1800s, some prostitutes ran whole towns! Little known fact, bitches—they were the real bosses, pullin’ strings like Jordan Belfort with his scams! “You gotta feed the geese to keep the blood flowing!”—they fed the town, kept it alive, y’see?

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. I mean, come on! I didn’t bring an umbrella. I dash to the nearest café, Caffè del Corso. I’m soaked, looking like a drowned rat. But hey, at least I can dry off with another espresso, right?

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