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But here’s the kicker—did ya know some prossies back in the day used coded ads in papers? Like, “French lessons” meant a blowie. Crafty, eh? Bet MI6 coulda used that for spyin’. Anyway, this bird, she’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m thinkin’, “This could go tits up.” Reminds me of that line, “You’re late again!”—Otilia screamin’ at Gabita. Felt like I was late to somethin’ dodgy too.

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After that little drama, I head over to the beach. The waves are crashing, and I’m thinking, “This is the life.” But then, I see this kid building a sandcastle. And not just any sandcastle—this thing was a fortress! I’m talking towers, moats, the whole shebang. I’m impressed, but then his little sister comes over and kicks it down. I felt that in my soul, man. I was ready to throw down! But then I remembered, it’s just sand. Kids, right?

Frattini: 2013′s top-10 moments in cycling