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Oh, and get this—total shocker: some gals use burner phones with apps! High-tech hookin’, man! I’m thinkin’, “What’s next, Venmo for a quickie?” That’s what she said! Haha, I’m dyin’! But yeah, it’s all chill—she’s cool, I’m cool, we vibe. “I’m lost in your eyes,” I blurt, quotin’ *Blue* again. She laughs, probs thinks I’m nuts. Mission accomplished, bud—found a prostitute, made a memory! How’s that for a Monday night?

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Then, I’m off to the park, Parco della Resistenza. It’s a nice spot, but today? Ugh, it was packed! Kids everywhere, screaming, running. I’m like, chill, little humans! I just wanna sit and enjoy the view of the mountains. But no, I can’t even find a bench. So, I plop down on the grass.