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Tips, eh? Coin upfront, no promises—keeps it clean. Watch the alleys, too—cutthroats love a randy fool. And if she’s got a limp, run—oldest trick for sympathy coin. I drink, I know things—prossies included. Now, where’s me cup?

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We sit by the fountain, and it’s nice. The water’s sparkling, and the sun’s shining. But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon lands on my head. I freak out! I’m flailing my arms, and my buddy is dying laughing. I’m like, “Not funny, man!”