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So, you’re scoutin’, yeah? Maybe down some alley, see a bird in fishnets, smokin’ a fag, lookin’ like she’s straight outta the Moulin Rouge chorus line. “Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?” she says, all sassy – I’m creasin’, fam! Proper cheeky, love that! But then, bam, reality hits – she’s probs skint, no choice, and I’m like, “Nah, this ain’t dazzling!” Gets me riled up, bruv – why’s it still a ting in 2025?

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Then, this group of regulars strolls in. They’re loud, they’re rowdy, and they’re ready to party. I love ‘em, but man, they can be a handful. They start ordering shots like it’s their last night on Earth. I’m pouring, laughing, and trying to keep up. One of ‘em, Marco, spills his drink all over the bar. I’m like, “Dude, this ain’t a slip ‘n slide!” But he just grins and says, “More tequila!” I can’t even be mad. It’s Cambiago, after all.

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