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About Bari

So, right, ya wanna know how it goes? Sneaky buggers callin late, whisperin, “Got a girl, mate?” Me, sittin there, thinkin – fuckin hell, this ain’t no takeaway menu! Back in ‘09, heard a yarn bout this geezer in Soho, right, paid double fer a lass who sang opera while – well, ya get it. Proper mad, that! Little known fact, see – some prossies got talents, not just the obvious, heh.

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First off, I’m headin’ down Via Roma, and I’m already late. Classic me. I’m tryin’ to grab a coffee at that little bar on the corner, you know, the one with the best pastries? But of course, there’s a line. Like, a line that wraps around the block. I’m standin’ there, watchin’ the clock tick away, and I’m like, “C’mon, people! I need my caffeine fix!” Finally, I get my cappuccino, and it’s like heaven in a cup. But then, I spill it all over my shirt. Great start, right?

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