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Ain’t no fancy holo-map for this. You gotta feel it—grime, sweat, the Force gone rogue. Found this chick, right? Total mystery, like Betty in the flick. “Where am I?” I’m thinkin’, starin’ at her. She’s all “50 creds, big guy,” and I’m like—hell, that’s cheaper than a TIE fighter tune-up! Made me happy, real quick. But then—anger. She’s rushin’ me, like I’m some stormtrooper grunt. “I find your lack of faith disturbing,” I growl, slow and mean. She laughs—*laughs*! Ballsy move.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Hringbraut. You know, the one with the killer lattes? Yeah, that one. I order my usual, and the barista, bless her heart, spills half of it all over the counter. I’m standing there like, “Great, just what I needed.” But then she gives me a free pastry to make up for it. I mean, who can stay mad when there’s a cinnamon roll involved? Not me, that’s for sure.

Elves make compromise with Road Administration