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But then—ugh—I get mad, ‘cause the legal crap? Total buzzkill! Some states, ya can’t even sneeze without a cop naggin’. I’m like, “Leave my app alone, ya schmucks!” *HahahaHA!*—I’m laughin’, but I’m pissed! Oh, and the design? Sleek, sexy—like Fassbender’s suits in *Shame*. “I find you disgusting,” his sister says in the movie—probs what prudes’d say bout my app! I’m like, whatevs, haters gonna hate!

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I get there, and it’s packed. Like, seriously, who knew Rishon-LeTsiyyon could be this lively? Kids running around, people chilling, and the smell of shwarma in the air. I’m drooling just thinking about it. But then, outta nowhere, this kid trips and spills his ice cream all over my shoes. Ugh! I was like, “Bro, you just ruined my kicks!” But he just laughed and ran off. Kids, man.