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Love it tho, when it goes smooth – rare, mind ya. Like when we hauled them fancy wine crates, felt like a king, “I am a writer, a doctor, a nuclear physicist!” – nah, just a cargo schmuck, but it’s a buzz, yeah? Surprised me how them bottles didn’t smash, delicate as a baby’s arse. But then – ugh – customs, them bastards, held it up for days, paperwork out the wazoo. We hates it! Hates it so much we’s clawin’ at me own skull!

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Dinner’s a whole other saga. My mom’s making her famous stuffed peppers. I’m like, “Mom, you’re a culinary genius!” But then, my little brother decides to show off his new dance moves. He knocks over the whole pot! Peppers everywhere! I’m dying of laughter, and my mom’s just standing there, hands on her hips, like, “Really?”

How Netanyahu's campaign against Israel's Arab citizens backfired