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Oh, and here’s a kicker—*Crouching Tiger* vibes again. “A faithful heart makes wishes come true,” movie says. Bullcrap. Xiu Lan wished for freedom, got knifed instead. Typical. World’s a dumpster fire. Still, gotta admire the hustle—prostitutes got grit, more’n most. I’d tip my hat, but I hate hats. And people. And everythin’. So, there ya go, pal—whores ain’t the problem, we are. Now, pass the bacon.

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After that, I head over to the park near Al-Jazira Street. It’s usually my go-to spot for some peace. But today? Nope. There’s a group of kids playing soccer, and they’re LOUD. I’m trying to read, but all I hear is “GOAL!” and “Pass it!” I’m like, “Can’t a proofreader catch a break?”

Severed head of former ambassador's son found by northern Israel school