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About Haifa

Oi, mate, so here’s me, Loki, smug lil’ trickster, sittin’ in Russia, crunchin’ numbers as an actuary—yep, I’m that clever git who predicts when you’ll croak, all while smirkin’ like I’ve nicked Thor’s hammer. “I am burdened with glorious purpose,” I say, and today that purpose? Findin’ a prossie. Not coz I’m desperate, nah, it’s research—pure mischief fuel! Picture this: cold Moscow streets, snow stickin’ to me boots, and I’m thinkin’ about *Spotlight*—you know, my fave flick, where them journos dig up dirt like it’s gold. “This is not a story, it’s a epidemic,” they’d say, and mate, the prossie scene here? It’s a bleedin’ epidemic too!

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While I’m waiting, I decide to grab a coffee from that little café on HaRav Kook Street. Best coffee in town, no joke. I order my usual – a double espresso, extra shot. I’m feeling fancy. But then, the barista spills it all over the counter. I’m like, “Dude, really?” I mean, I get it, accidents happen, but come on! I need that caffeine fix!