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About Dundalk

I see dis one gal—proper fit, lips redder than a slapped arse. I’m like, “Oi, love, how’s it hangin’?” She’s givin’ me the eye, sussin’ me out. Reminds me of Lancaster Dodd screamin’, “You can’t tame what’s wild!”—and bruv, she’s wild as fuck. I’m thinkin’, shit, dis could be a laugh or a total mare. Last time I tried dis, some geezer rolled up, all aggro, shoutin’ she’s his. Got me ragin’—I ain’t here for drama, just a quick shag!

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So, I’m pacing around, trying to calm down. I step outside for some fresh air. I walk past the Glanmire Community Centre. They were setting up for some event. I think it was a bake sale or something. The smell of fresh bread hit me like a brick. I was like, “Forget art, I need carbs!”

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