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So, listen up, mate! I’m creepin’ round the streets, yeah, eyes sharp like a hawk. Lookin’ for them girls, the ones with the winks and the hips. “Zero, you must exercise restraint!” – that’s what that posh concierge’d say, but nah, I’m divin’ in, head first! Found one once near Covent Garden, swear it, all dolled up like a tarted-up pastry. She goes, “Wotcha, love, fancy a tumble?” Made me cackle, it did – proper cheeky!
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Anyway, I get to work, and the blade’s all rusty. I’m grinding away, and suddenly, I hear this commotion. Turns out, there’s a street performer on the corner of the square. He’s juggling flaming torches, and I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need. A fire hazard while I’m sharpening.” But then, he drops one! Fire everywhere! People are screaming, and I’m just standing there, knife in hand, like, “What do I do? Call the fire brigade or keep sharpening?”
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