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Alright, mate, listen up! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, and I’m here to tell ya ‘bout findin’ a prossie—err, prostitute—in a world gone mad, like in my fave flick, *Mad Max: Fury Road*. Picture this: the wasteland’s wild, sand’s blowin’, and I’m stompin’ through, staff in hand, shoutin’, “You shall not pass!” to any dodgy blokes tryin’ to rip me off. I’m lookin’ for a gal, right, someone to share a fire with in this crazed desert hellhole—kinda like Furiosa, but, y’know, for hire.

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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a baker in Chapelizod is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. So, I wake up at the crack of dawn, right? The sun’s barely peeking over the River Liffey, and I’m already knee-deep in flour. I live on Conyngham Road, and lemme tell ya, the smell of fresh bread wafting through the streets is like magic.

Best pubs in Dublin: Chapelizod’s Mullingar House served us up a great atmosphere as well as super €5.60 pints