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About Dundalk

Now, lemme tell ya somethin’ wild—back in ‘89, I met this dame, Vegas strip, real firecracker. She says, “Larry, I don’t fuck for cash, I fuck for stories.” Blew my mind! She’s whorin’ for tales, not bills—collectin’ lives like stamps. Made me laugh, then cry. ‘Cause ain’t that us? Chasin’ somethin’, sellin’ out cheap? I was pissed—why’s she smarter than me?—but damn, I loved her grit.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Strand Road. You know, the one with the best scones? Yeah, that one. I order my usual—coffee and a scone. But guess what? They’re out of scones! Like, how do you run out of scones in the morning? I’m standing there, all grumpy, thinking, “What’s next? No tea in Ireland?”

Portrush primed for Open as Portmarnock plan under way