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Im a Portlaoise gal hoping to find a man with a heart of gold

About Myself
Its nice to see you, I am Emily, i call Portlaoise home, and Find A Prostitute is cutting edge, i want to bend you over and spank you, i am enchanted by the rhythm of GFE and Ball Licking and Sucking? I celebrate every voice and every story..
About Dublin
I was chuffed to bits, but then – surprise! – she’s chattin me up bout her pet iguana. An iguana! Who’d’a thunk it? Cracked me up, proper belly laugh. We shall fight the boredom with these quirky birds! Dunno if she was takin the piss or just lonely, but it made me day. Still, cost me a pretty penny – £80! Robbery, innit? Coulda watched *Inception* 20 times for that.
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Later, I decided to grab some grub at a spot on the Portlaoise Road. The food was bomb! I ordered a burger, and it was massive. Like, I needed a forklift to lift it! I took a bite, and it was pure bliss. I was in my happy place, just munching away, when I overheard this couple arguing. They were going at it, man! I mean, it was like a scene from a soap opera. I couldn’t help but eavesdrop. Turns out, they were fighting over who left the lights on at home. Classic!
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